There are two sides of a coin in the issue about self-esteem development in children. One side tells us that self-esteem in children is about having this yearning to develop a sense of self-worth. The other part claims that self-esteem is not a cause but rather an end-result of developing confidence in children. This sort of Catch-22 points to one common thing though: parental involvement is essential to help kids form accurate, healthy self-perceptions.
You may ask bluntly, “Where does self-esteem come from and how can I use it to my child’s advantage?” Well, the answer is apparently less obvious than the definitions of self-esteem itself. First off, self-esteem comes from doing things that are a challenge or difficult for us, in overcoming problems that are generally hard for others within our peer group.
The problem with children though is that they often avoid challenges in the first place instead of taking them head on. Why? Because they don’t want to develop feelings of inadequacy. Inadequacy which they know can come from experiencing failure in doing those challenges. So what happens is that they don’t develop self-esteem.
Parent’s often psyche themselves into thinking that if they praise their children more or encourage them often, the child’s self-confidence would boost up. But that isn’t the case. The real problem is not helping the child learn how to handle the problem in the first place.
The concept of success following persistence starts early in life and as kids try and fail over and over again, until they finally succeed in accomplishing a certain task or goal, they develop ideas about their own capabilities. At the same time, they’re creating self-concepts based on interactions with other people. This is why parental involvement is essential to helping kids form accurate, healthy self-perceptions.
Helene Goldnadel believes that self-esteem plays a key role in the development of a child’s behavior. In a broad sense, self-esteem can be considered as a deciding factor for whether a child turns out to be a problem or not. And parents are advised to become involved in this stage of personality development in their child as much as they can.