How to Treat Impulsive Behaviors in Your Child?

It’s never easy parenting an impulsive child. No matter how you love him or her, the endless frustration of coping with erratic and ill-considered actions is always with you. Where another child might stop and think before trying to climb a bookshelf…your child climbs now, thinks later. Dropping a full glass on the floor just to see what happens? A child with poor impulse control will barely hesitate, and will not be prepared for accepting the consequences.


But treating impulsive behaviors is a challenge. Too many doctors and educators have been falling back on the “easy” option of using strong prescription medications. Prescription medications can’t teach a child good judgment, and they can interfere with his or her ability to learn to read and stunt growth and development.


When you’re parenting an impulsive child the question is, “Which is more important: controlling the behaviors now, or helping the child learn how to control his behavior now and in the future?”


Don’t despair because there are options. Many people parenting an impulsive child choose to rough it out and avoid prescription medications entirely, relying on good home teaching and supervision, behavior therapy, and natural alternative medication. Others choose to work with their doctors to design personal programs based on a similar combination of non-prescription approaches with a prescription element added at a much lower level.


Then there are those who find that treating impulsive behaviors in a particular child will still demand prescription medications at a higher level, but the side effects can be reduced by using natural alternative medications.


You are the one parenting an impulsive child. You are the one close enough to know the costs and benefits of treating impulsive behaviors with harsh medications that on some levels may make your child worse. Therefore you must be part of the decision making team. Take time to learn about all the options.


Behavior therapy with a strong follow-through of in-home discipline and environment control is a great place for almost any impulsive child to start. Instead of simply flattening the impulsive response, they teach a child to recognize it, stop, and think things through before acting. The skills developed will serve your child forever.


Similarly, homeopathic medications like Hyoscyamus, Arsen Iod, Verta Alb and Tuberculinum offered in low solutions calm the brain and increase your child’s ability to focus and make good decisions. Where prescription medications are the “elephant gun” approach to stopping impulsivity, homeopathic solutions and formulas are a gentle, but more effective solution for treating impulsive behaviors.


Parenting an impulsive child isn’t ever going to be simple or easy. Making the right choices will make a huge difference in your child’s life, now and in the future, though. Take the time to look into the various alternatives open to you. By combining treatments with the knowledge and guidance of your doctor you can come up with the best possible program for you and your child.


Also read: Preventing Hereditary Child Food Allergies


Helene Goldnadel on the Development of an Angry Child

Anger is a reaction that all humans feel and express. It’s part of the “fight or flight” reaction that makes us act when we encounter danger. It’s an important tool that we use to make certain our urgent needs are met.


So, what tics you off? It seems pretty easy to assume that the things that bother us as adults are legitimate. If we are stopped by too many traffic lights on our way to an important meeting, we get “miffed”. If the newly hired boss’ nephew gets your well-deserved promotion you were expecting, you get “hot”. When your child purposefully throws his plateful of spaghetti against your white drapes, you’re pretty likely to get steamed!


Kids have urgent needs, too. The needs may not seem as big or as easy to identify as those that anger adults – but if you watch a kid get angry, you can bet that to him/her the urgent need was pretty darned important.


Below are three primary reasons that kids get angry according to Helene Goldnadel:


**About Unmet Needs. Children are born totally helpless and dependent upon us to attend to their every need: food, warmth, attention, comfort. If an infant gets hungry, he cries to alert us to handle it! At about 6 weeks-old, babies learn to smile to get the attention they need – and it works because no parent can resist this endearing socialization tactic. As they grow and mature, their abilities to take care of their own needs become more elaborate, but you’ll still get complaints when their inexperience prevents them from full satisfaction.


At first kids seem to try simple notification with a cry or a yell. But when the problem is not handled or eliminated, just watch the rage erupt. To an immature developing person, this may seem the ONLY way to get an adult to intervene. And, it works pretty darned well!!!


**About Frustration. The simplicity of infancy behind them, children eventually develop more complex social, emotional and intellectual needs. When the kid tries to build a tower with blocks and it keeps falling down, he is likely to get frustrated. When the child tries to get another child to get out of her way, she’s likely to get frustrated and angry. When the child’s older brother has permission to climb higher on the jungle-gym than Mom allows the younger brother to do, he’s likely to get really angry – at Mom.


Frustration is a normal part of life. We don’t always get everything we want in the exact way we want it! When frustration is repeatedly a part of a child’s experience, he/she could get discouraged and begin to expect that things won’t work out – then watch out! Children who do not receive encouragement from their parents are likely to simmer in their frustration. And, those who do not learn how to handle their frustration are likely to develop a short-fuse toward anger outbursts.


**About “Useful” Anger. Unlike reactive anger, functional anger is a learned behavior. Some children learn that anger works great to manipulate the people around them. A well-staged temper-tantrum can demand full attention, embarrass parents, or force any issue. A child that uses anger is going to have a difficulty learning new social behaviors to get his/her needs met – because anger works so profoundly.


No matter what stimulates the anger, a frequently “angry” child needs help. This child needs guidance to discover effective ways to get his needs met; or he/she needs help learning how to deal with frustration; or he/she needs to learn a wider range of behaviors to effectively relate to people. Understanding the development of angry children is an important first step toward creating a parenting plan to help them modify their anger responses or behaviors.


Every kid is unique. Every parent-child relationship is unique. No advice for ANY parent-child situation is going to work for EVERY family. However, the key to successful parenting KNOW why your children do what they do or how their behavior serves them. And when the goin’-gets-rough, go-‘n’-get more information


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Connecting Just Enough with Your Child

Getting involved with what your child does, but not overdoing it, enhances your child’s total development. Studies show that children whose parents are involved in their work generally excel in what they do in school, in their hobbies, and other extracurricular activities. These children tend to have more self-confidence or higher levels of self-esteem.

Be wary, however, of overdoing parent involvement in your child’s school activities. Your child may fall into a trap of being too dependent on you. Children need privacy, freedom and space so that they can develop their own talents, skills and abilities. Doing things for what your child needs to do will not hasten his learning process. Instead, you will slow that process down. It does not matter if they are making mistakes or not doing enough when doing their work, what is important is he gets to learn by experience. He will be deprived of this opportunity if you keep on doing things for him.

Allowing your child to learn by himself is not easy for parents. We are too eager to help our child succeed, and come to their aid when they fail. Remember, your primary task is to guide and encourage your child in his school and other activities. By all means, reward him with praises for his successes, big or small. But learn when to step in and when to let your child be. Develop his creative nature by encouraging him various ways of doing things or approaching problems. Doing things differently does not necessarily make it wrong or inferior to what we consider to be standard practice. In fact it can create opportunities for learning not only for the child but for you, too.

Also keep some distance when it comes to your child’s social life. Be around when you feel your child needs you. But when he says he needs time to figure out his problems himself, grant him that need. Just assure him of your guiding presence whenever your child invokes his need for your help. At his age of restlessness and discovery, he needs to go through learning processes by himself, with some help from his parents.


Also read: Effective Child Discipline Tips by Helene Goldnadel

Self-Esteem is a Key Factor in Child Personality Development

There are two sides of a coin in the issue about self-esteem development in children. One side tells us that self-esteem in children is about having this yearning to develop a sense of self-worth. The other part claims that self-esteem is not a cause but rather an end-result of developing confidence in children. This sort of Catch-22 points to one common thing though: parental involvement is essential to help kids form accurate, healthy self-perceptions.


You may ask bluntly, “Where does self-esteem come from and how can I use it to my child’s advantage?” Well, the answer is apparently less obvious than the definitions of self-esteem itself. First off, self-esteem comes from doing things that are a challenge or difficult for us, in overcoming problems that are generally hard for others within our peer group.


The problem with children though is that they often avoid challenges in the first place instead of taking them head on. Why? Because they don’t want to develop feelings of inadequacy. Inadequacy which they know can come from experiencing failure in doing those challenges. So what happens is that they don’t develop self-esteem.


Parent’s often psyche themselves into thinking that if they praise their children more or encourage them often, the child’s self-confidence would boost up. But that isn’t the case. The real problem is not helping the child learn how to handle the problem in the first place.


The concept of success following persistence starts early in life and as kids try and fail over and over again, until they finally succeed in accomplishing a certain task or goal, they develop ideas about their own capabilities. At the same time, they’re creating self-concepts based on interactions with other people. This is why parental involvement is essential to helping kids form accurate, healthy self-perceptions.


Helene Goldnadel believes that self-esteem plays a key role in the development of a child’s behavior. In a broad sense, self-esteem can be considered as a deciding factor for whether a child turns out to be a problem or not. And parents are advised to become involved in this stage of personality development in their child as much as they can.


Also read: Helene Goldnadel on Preparing Your Child Cognitively to Read

Bring Out the Genius within Your Child

If you have 2 equally well-formed plant seedlings and you put one in a nutrient-rich solution and another in a nutrient-poor solution, what would happen? A biologist who did this experiment found that the seedling grown in a nutrient-rich environment grew tall and bloom very well while the other grown in nutrient-poor environment had stunted growth. Environment, not the biological inheritance of these seedlings has determined their actual growth and success in each case.


Similarly, if you child has a nutrient-rich environment, he can excel and blossom with his natural talents and gifts. For example, Mozart’s father was an established court violinist and musician in Salzburg, Austria. He taught his son to play the harpsichord, violin and music when Mozart was a young child. The young Mozart achieved fame very soon. His father was able to introduce him to circles of influential people, using his position as a court musician in Salzburg. Age was not seen as a barrier to Mozart being able to learn and develop complex musical technique. When the young Mozart showed his interest in music above all other things, his parents encouraged him and supported him.


As a young child, Leonardo da Vinci’s parents supported him in his enthusiasm to explore very wide-ranging interests including mathematics, science, music and art. In his early teens, da Vinci became an apprentice at the studio of an established and respected artist of the day, Andrea del Verrocchio. During his time at del Verrocchio’s studio, da Vinci developed his artistic skills. At the same time, however, he was still able to carry on his talent for scientific inventions, using his artistic ability to depict his revolutionary ideas with real visual detail and clarity.


However, Einstein’s early years were more in line with today’s conventional educational experience. From being a baby, his family supported him greatly in developing his gifts and talents. He started his school career with primary school and ended it in higher education. Contrary to popular myth, Einstein was not a man obsessed with science, his interests both in his childhood and later life were always more diverse than that. In his youth, he explored religious thought and ethics, and took up the violin when he was 12 – something which he continued throughout his life. His parents allowed him to take his entrance examinations to higher education at the age of 16, two years younger than would be the norm.


In the economic sense, neither the family of Mozart, da Vinci nor Einstein were especially wealthy. So what do all three childhoods of these geniuses have in common?


The foundations of genius


  • Parents who believed in their abilities as children and supported them
  • Individual abilities in various fields
  • Opportunities to develop their own individual gifts and talents
  • No sense of any limits being set on their abilities
  • Focus on the ability of the individual
  • Discovery, recognition and appreciation of their abilities by others.


In the age of computers in our modern day, we can use home based child education programs for children development to teach your baby reading or baby math. Yes, your baby can start reading early with the right method and attitude. You can teach your baby reading or math, without the stress and it can be fun.


Helene Goldnadel is of the view that with proper guidance in their early years, any child can develop their gifts and talents. It is up to us as parents to guide them along their way. With a well thought out home based program, you can develop the true potential in your child to realize their own genius within.

Developing Your Child’s Sense of Humor

A sense of humor is such an important part of being a human. If we don’t laugh we can hardly live. Someone once said that man is the social animal. A human is the animal that laughs. Laughter is what redeems the darkest days and helps make the bright ones just a little bit brighter. It is the icing on the cake of life. We know that people who tend to laugh are healthier and mentally happier. They can look at the problems of life and get through them because they don’t seem as daunting. This doesn’t mean that laughter is the cure for everything, but it sure can help when things are not going so well.


These tried and trusted truths help to show why it is important for all of us, and particularly children, to have a good sense of humor. Children are our future, and while this seems a cliche, it is true. We need children and they need us. The world needs them. But not all children have a great sense of humor. We love most children partly because they are silly and seem to be full of life. You want to develop that sense of humor in your child, both for their well being and yours. How can you develop the sense of humor in your child? It surely isn’t much like training a dog to sit. While this is true, here are a few hints by Helene Goldnadel that could help you get your child to laugh more.


1) While we all want our children to laugh and to laugh a lot, consider that not all people laugh as much as others. Some people simply are not hard wired to giggle or guffaw in the way that others do. They might be a bit more sad or introverted. This is just fine. Remember that it takes all kinds to make a world. Don’t try to force a naturally quiet child to laugh all the time. It will probably only make them resent you. However, even a quiet and introverted child wants to laugh and needs to laugh. The key is to achieve a balance. Find the things that make your child laugh and surround your child with these things. If it is a TV show, purchase the DVD. If it is physical humor, show them movies with physical humor. There are all sorts of possibilities.

2) Make sure that your child is not scared or feeling unsafe. A child that feels threatened will not laugh. If you can give your child a safe and comfortable environment they will be far more likely to develop their sense of humor. Although we cannot ensure that our children will not have bad experiences, we do know that we can do a lot to help them stay safe in their early years.

3) Finally, make sure that your child has friends with a similar sense of humor. If you think back to your childhood, you probably laughed the most when you were with a group of silly friends. Watching movies together or singing songs was one of my favorite activities. A child’s sense of humor will develop with the sense of humor of their friends. If your child is not laughing much, consider introducing them to a few more kids.


Remember that a child is a person and deserves to be treated like one. If they don’t want to laugh then they don’t want to. You cannot force them, but if you truly desire their happiness you can help them laugh a bit more.

Also read: Building a Secure Attachment With Your Child

Developing A Child’s Imagination With Activities That Kids Love

Children should be given the freedom to explore themselves, share their ideas through different play activities. Learning through play can help them explore about themselves, people and world around them. By giving them endless play time; we are giving them the space to explore that helps them find solutions to problems through creative thinking. For them, playing and learning are two sides of the same coin. The play classes develop your child’s motor skills, physical development, mental development, social skills, etc. Now a day’s kids are spoon fed with swimming classes, coaching classes, dance and music classes that they do not even know how to play with a doll. That creates an unimaginative life around them.


Benefits of Boosting Your Child’s Imagination


Play is a powerful tool that helps in mastering new skills without much stress. Discover your child’s real self, through his imaginations and creativity. Boosting a child’s imagination helps them gain the following skills according to Helene Goldnadel.


  • Gain social skills – While they play with people around them, they learn about relationships among people and how to behave with elders. Playing tent or house, they learn about a parent’s affection for their child. They also develop empathy and care for others. They also learn to adjust with any situation and develop self-confidence.
  • Develop language skills – Kids who do a lot of talking while playing develop appropriate sentence structure and excellent communicative skills.
  • Gains intellectual development – Those who do a lot of imagination will learn to think symbolically. This will help in the child’s over all development.
  • Builds self-confidence – Playing police and thief, they work out of their fears and develop self-confidence and becomes bold. They also becomes aware of the social injustices.
  • Develop motor skills – Dancing to music, art and craft, all enhances their motor skills which help them to do any activity easily.


How to Nurture Your Child? Sending kids to dance classes or art classes cannot boost their imagination. Just be a play mate for them which is more than enough. Play cars or mommy and daddy with them, Smash and bash the cars along with him. Now see his imagination flowing out. It is time to think out of the box.


Monitor your kids carefully while they play and know their interest and help them develop that. Give them more opportunities to try out new things like art and craft, outdoor play, sports, music, or provide them with materials like scissors, play dough, color papers or color pencils that might interest them. Help them come out with their own imagination. Never discourage them when they are up to do something creative and add fuel to their learning curiosity.


Learning Through Play


Only a child with imaginative skill can play well as playing needs imagination. So what can be done to boost a child’s imagination? Read stories for them and ask them to do character play of the story, take them to picnics, trip to a zoo, or beach to give them new experience. Dance to music along with them or read books for them. Always place a box of crayons, scissors, craft paper, gum, paints, on the kids table so that they can use them whenever they want to explore their imagination. Allow to play with water or sand and give them ample time to create wonderful things from their imagination. They can develop a sense of achievement and self-confidence from each successful invention.


Also read: Signs That Your Child May Have a Language Disorder